They Pay You For That!?

I am an electrical engineer. We come in many different flavors but my particular specialty is electronic circuit design. Lately, at work, I have been designing a new circuit and have been working on the schematics. At dinner last night, I was telling my wife that I have a review coming up next week and I was a little frustrated that at work that day, a change had been made to the requirements meaning that I had to update the schematics.

My six year old daughter looked at me and asked, "What's a meschatic?"

I explained, "A schematic is a drawing of an electrical circuit. It tells people how to make it so that electricity goes the way we want and does what we want it to do."

I pointed at the light above us. "This light is an electric circuit. So is the computer. Some circuits are simple like this light and some are complex like the computer. I make complex ones that go in missiles."

She looked at me with wonder in her eyes. "You draw all day at work!?"

Yes. Yes I do.

This One's For You, Mrawmins

Found in a candy shop at the end of pier 39 in San Francisco. Let the gathering of Israel commence... in my belly.

Fire Baby

I was burning up some old tree trimmings in the backyard when I looked up and saw this.

I don't think she brought a hot dog on purpose but I still think it's funny.

What Nerds Do Without Trucks

A friend of mine needed help moving rocks this morning so I went over to help.

Yes, that's a wheelbarrow.

Yes, it's on top of a bike trailer; I collapsed it.

It may be hard to see but those are bungee cords holding it in place - we're big on safety around here.

A lot of cars honked at me on my way over. They must have thought it was a really good idea too.

Emissions Exemption

I live in one of those rare but wonderful parts of the country that are exempt from emissions testing for car registrations (assuming you don't drive into the metro area north of here for school or work). We also don't have safety inspections. I'm not sure if all states do this now or not but we have online registration renewals too. This means that the yearly hassle of driving around at the end of the month to get the registration renewed isn't really an issue for us. We just go to the DMV website, type in our information, give them a credit card number, and they send us a new sticker in the mail. Easy as pie. In theory.

You see, the northern tip of the zip code I live in is not exempt from emissions testing. And the criteria the DMV website uses to determine your requirement status? Zip code, of course. When I called the DMV to clear this up (silly me thinking it could be done over the phone) I was told that all I had to do was go in to a DMV office, fill out an emissions exemption form, bring in photocopies of my current registration, a utility bill, and my most recent property tax valuation, a pound of flesh, a lock of hair from my first born child and $9 to process the paperwork.

Now, as a general rule, I try to be as polite and friendly as possible over the phone. I know that the level one operators have absolutely no power. They don't make the rules, they can't change the rules, and getting upset with them will get you nowhere. They deal with cranky people all day and the best way to get anywhere with them is to be nice. So, as nicely as I could, I tried to explain that I was sure that this couldn't be the solution to my problem. Surely all somebody really needed to do was look at the address I had on record (You know, the one you use to send me my registration renewal form? The one you used to figure out what zip code I live in?) and use the handy map (also on the website) to figure out that I quite clearly live outside the emissions control zone.

That cheek earned me 30 minutes on hold waiting for a level 2 operator. Honestly, in 30 minutes, they could have given my level 1 operator level 2 operator training and I wouldn't have had to listen to the bad music and the interruptions every 30 seconds telling me that my call is important. All to no avail. DMV policy is that those who live in a partially covered zip code automatically get the requirement on their registration until they submit an emissions exemption form which becomes a permanent part of their registration.

I just want to point out that this is why average people hate the government. It's annoying to see lawmakers bickering on capitol hill but we forget that pretty quickly (which is why we keep electing them). It's the little but constant irritations stemming from government bureaucracies and inefficiencies that really drive the angst. To start with, the DMV has my address on file. There is no reason for them to be in doubt about where I live. The DMV also has a fairly high fidelity map on their website so that visitors can see if they live in or out of the control zone. Why they can't use these tools at their disposal to determine actual emissions requirement status is beyond my ability to comprehend. Secondly, why on earth do I need to bring a copy of my current registration to the DMV to process an emissions exemption form? Isn't that the one thing they should have? My most recent property tax valuation and a recent utility bill? Really? I think we've already established that my address is no mystery. And even if I were to accept that they need to make absolutely sure I wasn't lying about my address, why is it that they'll just take my word on the fact that I don't drive the vehicle into the metro area to the north for school or work?

The entire process strains credulity and makes my blood boil. But it's possible that it is still preferable to actually getting the emissions tested.

Sushi!

My wife doesn't like sushi. It's a shame since it means I don't get to eat it very often but at least it means I don't have to share. I decided a while back that I wanted some but I was stymied by not being able to find a rolling mat at the grocery store. The sushi hater finally said, "Why don't you just order one off of Amazon?" Genius. Apparently, they sell nori sheets too.

I like all kinds of sushi but when it comes down to it, it's hard to beat a good California roll.

Only one of my children was brave enough to try a bite and she quickly decided it wasn't for her. My wife, to her credit did eat one, if only to verify that yep, she doesn't like sushi.

But, then again, who would be sad about leftover sushi?

Luckily, I planned for nobody else wanting to eat any and got some pizza too.

Pizza and sushi: not a bad combination, really.

Gyoza Fried Rice

I made gyoza last weekend. It was a happy day. Midway through eating, my stomach started to hurt. So I kept eating until it went away. I made 52 gyoza and froze half so that I could have another happy day sometime in the future. There was, however, one dark cloud in my otherwise perfect gyoza filled day: I ran out of wrappers before the filling was used up. My eyes teared up at the gyoza that would never be made. Never would the filling be warmly nestled in a wrapper, never would it be lovingly caressed by the hot oil that would give it a perfect brown crust. The weight of this culinary crime was almost too much to bear until the dark cloud broke, revealing the silver lining: I could save the filling and use it to make fried rice.

Gyoza Fried Rice:

I had about a cup of leftover filling but any amount will work - fried rice is good like that.

Heat a generous amount of vegetable oil in a frying pan/wok. Don't be shy with the oil since you need enough to fry the rice in as well. Toss in a carrot, half a medium onion, and a few garlic cloves, all finely chopped. When the onions start to brown, add the gyoza filling and break it up into small pieces as it cooks. When the filling is cooked through, I put in a quarter of a chopped head of cabbage. (I had it left over from when I made the gyoza and I though it would add some nice color and texture) Let the cabbage start to wilt and then dump in 4 cups of cooked rice (2 cups uncooked). I seasoned mine with soy sauce, rice vinegar, and ginger (get it, just like gyoza). Let the rice fry, turning occasionally until a crust starts to form on the bottom. Serve immediately and reminisce about the wonderful gyoza of days gone by.